the situation Comics/Books

I don’t want to live in this world anymore: “The Situation” gets his own comic title


Well, we’re in the middle of 2012. This is the year the Mayans predicted the world would end- and between the Miami faceeater and the fact that Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino is getting his own comic book, I’m ready to be raptured.

 

In fact, fuck the rapture. Just leave me on Earth while everyone else goes up to Heaven, because Armageddon can’t possibly be worse than Mike “The Situation” Sorrentino infesting my local comic book store with his god-awful greasy face. I saw Left Behind…it can’t be that bad.

You read that right. The Situation is getting his own comic book. Check out the cover, which was recently released as a teaser:

Now go treat your eyes with Valtrex. Hurry, or the ocular herpes you're going to catch from this greasy wiener's smug grin will BURN OUT YOUR RETINAS.

Yep, that’s Greg Horn’s work on the cover. The same Greg Horn who illustrated this print, from the Emma Frost miniseries, currently waiting to be framed and hung in my living room:

 

Dammit, Greg Horn.

The book is being produced by Wizard World and MPS entertainment. I have to hand it to the oily-haired rodent- he has a REALLY good team of creators behind him, including the aforementioned Greg Horn, and Eisner award-winning writer Paul Jenkins, who has worked on Wolverine: Origins, Batman, and Spider-man. I don’t know how the Situation managed to round up such a roster of talent. Was Rob Liefeld out of the country? Liefeld would have been perfect for this project- he’s used to drawing ridiculous-looking, cartoonishly garish, unrealistic depictions of men. Drawing a washed-up, hackneyed reality “star” who’s famous for nothing as a Superhero would be right up Liefeld’s alley. More to the point, drawing The Situation as anything other than a shameful waste of semen and gray matter is an affront to man and God.

Here’s what the guido Golgotha had to say about his upcoming masturbatory shit festival…er…graphic opus:

“I was confident that an amazing artist like Greg Horn would come up with a great look, but I was still blown away by his painting,” said Sorrentino. “It has me more excited than ever to see what’s coming next.”

Of course he’s excited. He likes books with pretty pictures. Also, he’s a clinical moron, because a comic series based on one of the abhorrent meatheads from Jersey Shore seems like the worst idea since, well, this:

 

Yes, this is a real thing.

Come on, folks. I know there’s only so many times we can rehash a fight between The X-Men and Magneto, but are we really so hard up for ideas that we’d give a spoiled, overcooked reality brat his own comic book? Or is this just a case of money buying more attention?

Before you pick up this title, remember that the last time The Situation was allowed to do something besides act like an idiot on television, this happened:

No word yet on whether his superpower will be the Electric Fist-Bump.

For those of you with enough morbid curiosity and disposable income to pick up this title, the first books are due on shelves in early August, and will debut at Wizard World Chicago.


  • MoustafaChamli

    Why does it look like he has cum on his chest?

    Or was that the point?

  • switch1973

    So is June 1st the new April 1st ? Seriously….your putting me on right ?

    I feel dirty….

  • http://twitter.com/Threk Threk

    Ugh. Well I would hope comic book fans won’t buy it, and I suspect comic books are too highbrow for Jersey Shore fans. If it flops hopefully publishers won’t try crap like this again.

    Please please please tell me Steampunk Palin sold less than a dozen copies.

  • jimsupreme

     it sold out in a day… 6000+ copies. I know, as I wrote it. it’s not meant to be taken seriously. it’s written as a bad b-style movie.. like Sharktopus and meant to be laughed at.. anyone that takes it serious (like some republicans did) is an idiot.

  • http://twitter.com/rebelguru Joey Proulx

    jim, we should definitely interview you to get your insights as this is taking the net by storm!

  • jimsupreme
  • http://twitter.com/Threk Threk

    I’m sorry Jim. I immediately started thinking about some rabid Palin supporters I know who probably did take it seriously. I shouldn’t be mocking something that was intended to be silly just because some people might take it seriously.

  • jimsupreme

     no offence taken.  trust me, I get ribbed a lot about the book  and i’m okay with it. what i’m not okay with is those that judge all my other works due to that one… i’m not a big name or anything but i’m always appreciative of the fans that stick by me even when I do silly stuff like Steampunk Palin and the upcoming Robo-Reagan (if I can get the funding)

  • Elliott Rudner

    Robama > yuo