Geekpr0n Previews the Playstation VR

I must say, I’ve never been a fan of this Virtual Reality technology. Oh I admit when I was a wee lad in the 90s, when such business was synonymous with the word “Rad” and the color neon yellow, I was suckered due to raw youthful innocence.

So it was with great trepidation that I came to the Geekpr0n offices and was asked to preview one of the new VR video game headsets. I was seated on a chair as I was given the rundown.

“So Mike, we need you to try one of these new VR headsets for gaming! You excited?” asked one of my superiors (who mysteriously asked to go unnamed).

“You people have knocked me unconscious previously.”

“Good stuff! So sit still and close your eyes! You’re going to try out the new Playstation VR!” I shut my eyes and waited in my chair.  I heard the sound of duct tape being pulled as some object was strapped to my head.  After some time I was told to open my eyes.

Now I grant you I’m not one who shies away from computer generated imagery but what I saw before me was far and above anything else I’d ever seen! There I was looking at the Colosseum in Rome! The image looked so natural, almost as if it were from a real picture! I looked around to see more details but as I moved my head the image remained static.


Why literally this image here in fact!

“Umm… why isn’t the image changing?” I asked as I moved my head around.

“Oh… well it’s such a high detail picture it’s rendering slowly from our computer. Here!” I felt something push down on the side of my head and a black bar moved past my vision revealing another part of the city of Rome. Sure enough the same realistic detail was present and I was in awe of the still image before me.

“This is awesome! Can I use the controls?”

“No! Uh, those were broken upon delivery! We are using the keyboard to get you around!” came the reply.

“I see! Well the image looks very real! The lighting does seem to be changing the more I move my head. It’s quite clear too! I thought these units were supposed to be heavy!” I reached up to feel the VR unit only to have my hand slapped away. Once again I felt my head tilt to the right and the image changed to another part of Rome.

“Is this some sort of flying simulator?” I asked.

“Yeah… that’s totally it.” Came the reply. “So you think you’ve got enough for the review?”

“I think so.”

“Great!” At that moment the device was yanked from my head along with a loud tearing sound. I blinked into the light as I felt the back of my head. There was a suspicious horizontal bald strip around the back of my head that I attributed to friction of the unit. I looked around dazed slightly.

My supervisor gave me a shove towards the door, “Off you go! Go and write about the product!  And remember Mike! You can’t be sued for libel if you’re ignorant of the truth!”

“That’s not how it works at all!” But the door was closed behind me. Shrugging I headed home to write my review.

In closing the Playstation VR suffers from a lot of lag due to rendering high end graphics.  Also the harness for the device caused odd balding in certain areas. Despite that it was comfortably placed and easily accommodated a person with glasses. I look forward to future iterations of the product!


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